Stalking is a very real problem for at least 1.4 million Americans. Until recently, the news spotlighted celebrity cases. But unwanted pursuit is not reserved for the rich and famous. While the prominent cases may attract more media attention, the majority of stalking victims are not public figures, but ordinary people like you and me.

Most statutes define stalking as the willful, malicious and repeated following and harassing of another person. In addition to a pattern of conduct, many state laws mandate that an imminent, credible threat of violence be made against the victim for the activity to be considered stalking. But thirty-two states also consider the stalker's intent to instill fear as illegal, with all but six states defining criminal stalking as any activity that would instill fear in a reasonable person.

Thankfully, with the publication of the Model Anti-Stalking Code in 1994, law enforcement agencies are finally starting to realize that a threat doesn't doesn't require words. A hand that's pointed at you in the shape of a gun conveys a message that's loud and clear, especially if it follows ominous correspondence or telephone calls. A bouquet of black roses delivered to your door, a dead animal received in the mail, or a photograph with your image crossed out can also commuicate the same sentiment. Yet in a number of states, these very obvious threats would be inadmissable in a court of law.

While many stalkers don't attack, the threat of violence is usually inferred. Which means that even those victims who aren't physically harmed suffer tremendously in terms of fear, anxiety and the disruption of their daily lives.

Unfortunately, victims simply don't know what to do when confronted with being stalked. Neither does law enforcement nor the judicial system. Why? Because in many cases, stalkers successfully terrorize their victims without ever breaking the law.

While there are different kinds of stalking, invariably the stalker tries to establish a cult dynamic of one. It's a power and control trip through which the stalker tries to distort the victim's sense of reality. In many ways, stalking is like a rape that goes on and on.